It’s been a little over 2½ years since my divorce was final. I’ve dated a bit and have had a few “relationships” (of sorts), but, to be honest, I’m finding that I’m not entirely sure I know what I’m looking for this time around.
I have a “list.” (Yea, I go to a therapist from time to time, and she encouraged me to make a list.)
The list used to be on my phone like a grocery list, so I’ve dubbed it my man “shopping list.” I’m not ashamed to admit that it’s at least a 5 WalMart-bags-full-sized list. (Might be more, but, hey, they fit a LOT in those bags!)
There are obvious things on my list like:
- Likes children & eldery people
- Generous of heart/compassionate
- Enjoys volunteering
- [Insert quality inspired by and/or MISSING in 'past' relationship(s) here]
You get the idea.
Several months ago, I was dating someone that I felt had most (if not all) of the qualities on my list. Sadly, that relationship ended a few months ago.
What I didn’t realize until last week was that, during the relationship, I lost my ‘list’ when I got a new phone. Why would I have noticed? I thought I had what I was looking for.
So, now I’m making a new list, and this time it’s on paper. For the most part, I’m sure the list still looks the same.
Due to the relationship not lasting however, something HAD to be missing from the first list. I obviously overlooked my ‘egg’ (the ‘key’ ingredient that holds everything together).
The one thing I ‘assumed’ would be present and inadvertantly forgot to look for is on top of THIS list with an asterisk beside it. (I pray it’s my “egg.”)
I want someone that adores me. (I know, obviously right? Hear me out.)
I’m not looking for the creepy ‘worship’ adoration, or the “their life revolves around me” type of ‘adore.’ I want a man that LOVES me because it brings him JOY. Because “I” bring him JOY: Because “We” (as a couple) brings him JOY! It’s not that I want to be THE only ‘priority’ in his life, but that I want to be A priority.
I pray that isn’t too much to ask.
What is your ‘egg?’